IN THE NEWZ

by David P. Anderson

 

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A high school couple in Senoria, Ga., snapping their prom pictures were recently photo-bombed by a gang of zombie-fied actors working near the set of AMC’s The Walking Dead. The boy captured in the above photo said, “It’s still less creepy than being photo bombed by your parents.”

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A Parisian fashion brand has become the “butt” of ridicule for selling a $470 pair of high-cut denim panties. That’s right denim panties. The $470 price tag seems a bit steep for their target demographic: girlfriends of people who might be rednecks.

 

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Maisie Williams, who portrays Arya Stark on the popular HBO show Game of Thrones revealed that her breasts were bound as she aged on GOT. “That was when it really sucked,” said Williams. Which explains why the shows costume designer was on Arya’s kill list.

 

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Friday, an appeals court in Australia ruled that repeated flatulence targeted at another individual wasn’t a form of bullying or assault. Try telling that to the office mate of this guy.

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The Rachel Maddow Show, seen nightly on MSNBC, suffered a twenty percent decline in ratings since the release of the Mueller report that revealed no collusion between President Trump and Russia in the 2016 election. Is the dip in ratings a result of her audience tiring of her unwillingness to let go of the collusion conspiracy, or have viewers left her for the compelling episodes of Married at First Sight, season eight.

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SEVENTIES CHILD available at:

Amazon
https://t.co/L1t1BHfSpH

Barnes & Noble
https://t.co/LgJSmGNCxp

 

 

 

 


NETFLIX INKS LORI LOUGHLIN AND FELICITY HUFFMAN TO NEW PRISON SHOW

by David P. Anderson

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A spokesperson for Netflix announced that they have signed Lori Loughlin and Felicity Huffman to a three-season deal to star in a prison series titled DESPERATE INMATES. The two Hollywood stars were among fifty people arrested in the college fraud scheme last week. Both Loughlin and Huffman are out on bail and are awaiting trial. Read the rest of this entry »


THE BIRTHDAY PARTY

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Chapter from SEVENTIES CHILD

 

 

THE BIRTHDAY PARTY

 

The birthdays of my youth, kids handed out birthday card invites to kids in their grade that they liked. You can’t get away with that in the politically correct era of today—school administrators are too afraid someone would be offended; an uninvited kid might get their feelings hurt. When my daughter was in first grade they had a rule that you had to invite the entire class of girls to your party or none at all. That struck me as more than slightly fascist. What if there’s a bully in your class whose sole mission in life is to make you miserable? A future insurance salesman maybe? Should you have to invite him/her too? That would make a tense celebration with Mr. /Mrs. Future Axe Murder singing Happy Birthday with their frightened classmates. My family would have gone broke paying for all the presents to my five siblings’ classmates’ parties. Read the rest of this entry »


WELCOME TO SELF-SERVE WORLD

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I know self-service is not a new phenomenon. It started at gas stations fifty years ago, where once upon a time employees used to check your oil, clean your windows, check your tire pressure, and find suitors for your daughters with buck teeth. Is it just me or has the trend of businesses replacing humans exploded over the last few years. Read the rest of this entry »


LAUGHTER IN THE RAIN

 

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LAUGHTER IN THE RAIN

By David P. Anderson

 

This March 23rd is the fifteenth anniversary of my family’s greatest tragedy. It just so happens to also be my youngest daughter’s seventeenth birthday. On that fateful day we lost a beloved member of our family. Kaitlyn’s second birthday will never be forgotten, as will her humorous take on the unfortunate event. Read the rest of this entry »


A LITTLE COURTESY WON’T KILL YOU

A LITTLE COURTESY WON’T KILL YOU

by David P. Anderson

Exiting the gym yesterday into the wintry mess I spotted a woman I estimated to be in her early twenties shuffling through the slush towards the door. I opened the door fully, we made brief eye contact and I let her pass, waiting for a response.

Nothing.

Where was my “thank you”? I thought for a second that maybe she didn’t speak English and that’s why she stiffed me. But that’s ridiculous if she was a foreigner she could have offered a Spanish “gracias” or a German “danke”.  If she was from the planted Vulcan “itaren” would have sufficed. Her rudeness was rooted in a growing problem in our society: no manners. Read the rest of this entry »


THANKS FACEBOOK : (

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THANKS FACEBOOK  : (

          By David P. Anderson

 

I spent a year writing my fictional memoir Seventies Child, and over another fourteen months tearing what was left of my hair out rewriting. As an independent author I knew the importance of social media in marketing a book. We indies are all slaves to Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and the new LOOKATMYSELFIE. Before the book launch I tweaked my Facebook fan page, updating the name, the look, the setup, and adding links to my books and my world famous blog. The day I released the book I invited my Facebook friends to LIKE my fan page. I sent out one hundred invites and received roughly fifty Likes. My total of page Likes stood at 115. Good if you’re a fourth grader promoting your Pokémon YouTube videos, but for an author with two kids in college, not so much. I figured if I posted interesting material daily word would spread and I’d get more Likes. Read the rest of this entry »